You have to admit, that's sexier. (![[info]](http://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} stephen_fry) wrote,@ 2012-02-07 14:41:00 |
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Public Service Announcement
[Why I Like Lupin and Tonks as a Couple]
The Harry Potter series is sort of blamed for having a lot of little couples that get together in school and stay together forever, like Lily Evans & James Potter or Harry & Ginny. I mean, there are a lot of other couples that get together later (like my personal favourite, Rolf & Luna) but they aren't really talked about, like at all, beyond JKR's little sign-offs.
We do, however, see Lupin & Tonks. I'm not delusional enough to be unaware of the amount of fandom hatred directed at Tonks, but I don't give a shit. Yes, it might mess with someone's ship that Remus gets with a girl, and so what? I've been ignoring Mary Morstan for years, but that doesn't mean I hate her. Character bashing is petty, I think, particularly when they're disliked for the wrong reasons. (And sure, there are legitimate reasons for not liking Tonks, like the fact she comes out of no where, can change her hair-and-eye colours like all the worst Mary Sues and whatever else. I'm not disputing that. It's just irrelevant to what I want to say.)
Keep in mind, this is an opinion and it's my opinion and you're free to agree or disagree or whatever. but this is how I've always interrupted their relationship, and why I've always liked it.
What I think is overlooked, a lot, is the fact that Lupin and Tonks are really meant to represent people coming together during a time of war who probably otherwise wouldn't have. Compatibility aside (and I think it's more than hinted at a bit that they're quite opposite) they've a generation gap between them and without the Order probably wouldn't have spent enough time together.
They're also broken.
Now, this is probably a personal thing for me, so read on at your own risk. My Great-Grandmother on my Grandfather's side of the family was from a crazy-wealthy doctor's family. She married someone who worked on a boat and was basically disowned for it. (It's actually a really sad story. She was institutionalised in the 1930s and only actually died about 1992 but I never met her or knew anything about her until - when I was about 12 - I asked my Grandmother why Popa never spoke about his mother. My Nana said she always assumed it was the strain of being disowned that stressed her to the point of mental collapse. But hey. Mental Health in the 1930s was a crazy time.). Obviously, Andromeda Tonks was happy with the choices she made, but I refuse to believe that they were made entirely without difficulty. And, if Draco Malfoy is any evidence of the kind of Pure-blooded ridicule Muggleborns are exposed to, one can only imagine the kind of hatred thrown at Dora all the time that she was growning up. And I think that a lot of her 'rebellious' nature spawned from the fact that she wanted to create an identity for herself beyond the blood traitor's baby.
And, I think anyone who has ever been to high school will agree that people who are different or talented or special in any kind of way are more-often-than-not ridiculed by their peers, not supported. Tonks was different and I can only imagine that her metamorphmagus status and ability was reduced to a novelty more often than it should have been. If only she could find someone who could look past what she was and see WHO she was...
Enter, Remus Lupin.
There is something that everyone should know about Remus Lupin, and that's the fact that Everything he loves dies. No, like I mean it. Everyone.
James and Lily and Peter Pettigrew are murdered by Sirius Black. That's his entire foundation and the friendship that he built up, and the people that accepted him for who he was all gone in one fell swoop, and it's nearly 13 years until he learned that it wasn't Sirius, but Peter. Not that that really counts for anything because in the end, Remus spends 13 years in a very shitty place where he doesn't trust himself, his instincts or how he feels about other people. Because everyone he loves dies. And that little glimmer of hope shines and Sirius comes back (very damaged, mind you) I'm sure that meant the absolute world to Lupin.
And no, not in a 'ship' way. I'm talking about the fact that this person whom he loved like a best friend and a brother essencially comes back from the dead and he's not alone anymore.
And then he dies too. Shattering Remus into a million little wolf pieces.
Remus and Tonk's courtship follows. No, I don't think he was pressured into a relationship that he didn't want. But I think there was a whole lot more to why Remus didn't jump at the chance to be with someone besides the fact he was a werewolf. I think he had a lot of reservations, and I think he'd had his heart broken too many times, and I think he felt like he'd let his friends down far too many times to trust himself with someone else's love, and someone else's life.
But he comes around, and he comes around from a place that isn't perfect and so does she. They found each other while the entire world is teetering on the edge of collapse. Love at an unlikely time between two unlikely people. I love it, it's beautiful. But what drives it home for me, what really makes me like them is a couple is that FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HARRY POTTER HISTORY: LOVE DOESN'T FUCKING FIX EVERYTHING. Remus' fears and his self-doubt resurface. He's afraid for his wife and unborn child because of his own fucking track-record. I personally don't think he's abandoning them to help Harry because he suddenly wants a Sirius Black adventure, I think he's stepping out because he's afraid he's going to let her down and their child down. That he won't be able to protect them that he wasn't able to protect his friends.
The tragedy, I guess, is that he was right. (And obviously I don't blame him for the fact his wife died. But, I fucking bet that he would have blamed himself if he'd survived and she hadn't.)
I love the depth that's there. I love the fact that there are things happening that we don't see and that we can interpret them as we like and if your interpretation is different from mine, that's absolutely fine. But I think they were a good couple because they weren't a perfect couple. I think they're interesting because they had problems, both come from trouble, both have things about them that they want the world to see past and (in Remus' case in particular) certainly have issues.
How this does relate to RP
[Why I Like Lupin and Tonks as a Couple]
Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with the Lupin I'm playing at
The Harry Potter series is sort of blamed for having a lot of little couples that get together in school and stay together forever, like Lily Evans & James Potter or Harry & Ginny. I mean, there are a lot of other couples that get together later (like my personal favourite, Rolf & Luna) but they aren't really talked about, like at all, beyond JKR's little sign-offs.
We do, however, see Lupin & Tonks. I'm not delusional enough to be unaware of the amount of fandom hatred directed at Tonks, but I don't give a shit. Yes, it might mess with someone's ship that Remus gets with a girl, and so what? I've been ignoring Mary Morstan for years, but that doesn't mean I hate her. Character bashing is petty, I think, particularly when they're disliked for the wrong reasons. (And sure, there are legitimate reasons for not liking Tonks, like the fact she comes out of no where, can change her hair-and-eye colours like all the worst Mary Sues and whatever else. I'm not disputing that. It's just irrelevant to what I want to say.)
Keep in mind, this is an opinion and it's my opinion and you're free to agree or disagree or whatever. but this is how I've always interrupted their relationship, and why I've always liked it.
What I think is overlooked, a lot, is the fact that Lupin and Tonks are really meant to represent people coming together during a time of war who probably otherwise wouldn't have. Compatibility aside (and I think it's more than hinted at a bit that they're quite opposite) they've a generation gap between them and without the Order probably wouldn't have spent enough time together.
They're also broken.
Now, this is probably a personal thing for me, so read on at your own risk. My Great-Grandmother on my Grandfather's side of the family was from a crazy-wealthy doctor's family. She married someone who worked on a boat and was basically disowned for it. (It's actually a really sad story. She was institutionalised in the 1930s and only actually died about 1992 but I never met her or knew anything about her until - when I was about 12 - I asked my Grandmother why Popa never spoke about his mother. My Nana said she always assumed it was the strain of being disowned that stressed her to the point of mental collapse. But hey. Mental Health in the 1930s was a crazy time.). Obviously, Andromeda Tonks was happy with the choices she made, but I refuse to believe that they were made entirely without difficulty. And, if Draco Malfoy is any evidence of the kind of Pure-blooded ridicule Muggleborns are exposed to, one can only imagine the kind of hatred thrown at Dora all the time that she was growning up. And I think that a lot of her 'rebellious' nature spawned from the fact that she wanted to create an identity for herself beyond the blood traitor's baby.
And, I think anyone who has ever been to high school will agree that people who are different or talented or special in any kind of way are more-often-than-not ridiculed by their peers, not supported. Tonks was different and I can only imagine that her metamorphmagus status and ability was reduced to a novelty more often than it should have been. If only she could find someone who could look past what she was and see WHO she was...
Enter, Remus Lupin.
There is something that everyone should know about Remus Lupin, and that's the fact that Everything he loves dies. No, like I mean it. Everyone.
James and Lily and Peter Pettigrew are murdered by Sirius Black. That's his entire foundation and the friendship that he built up, and the people that accepted him for who he was all gone in one fell swoop, and it's nearly 13 years until he learned that it wasn't Sirius, but Peter. Not that that really counts for anything because in the end, Remus spends 13 years in a very shitty place where he doesn't trust himself, his instincts or how he feels about other people. Because everyone he loves dies. And that little glimmer of hope shines and Sirius comes back (very damaged, mind you) I'm sure that meant the absolute world to Lupin.
And no, not in a 'ship' way. I'm talking about the fact that this person whom he loved like a best friend and a brother essencially comes back from the dead and he's not alone anymore.
And then he dies too. Shattering Remus into a million little wolf pieces.
Remus and Tonk's courtship follows. No, I don't think he was pressured into a relationship that he didn't want. But I think there was a whole lot more to why Remus didn't jump at the chance to be with someone besides the fact he was a werewolf. I think he had a lot of reservations, and I think he'd had his heart broken too many times, and I think he felt like he'd let his friends down far too many times to trust himself with someone else's love, and someone else's life.
But he comes around, and he comes around from a place that isn't perfect and so does she. They found each other while the entire world is teetering on the edge of collapse. Love at an unlikely time between two unlikely people. I love it, it's beautiful. But what drives it home for me, what really makes me like them is a couple is that FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HARRY POTTER HISTORY: LOVE DOESN'T FUCKING FIX EVERYTHING. Remus' fears and his self-doubt resurface. He's afraid for his wife and unborn child because of his own fucking track-record. I personally don't think he's abandoning them to help Harry because he suddenly wants a Sirius Black adventure, I think he's stepping out because he's afraid he's going to let her down and their child down. That he won't be able to protect them that he wasn't able to protect his friends.
The tragedy, I guess, is that he was right. (And obviously I don't blame him for the fact his wife died. But, I fucking bet that he would have blamed himself if he'd survived and she hadn't.)
I love the depth that's there. I love the fact that there are things happening that we don't see and that we can interpret them as we like and if your interpretation is different from mine, that's absolutely fine. But I think they were a good couple because they weren't a perfect couple. I think they're interesting because they had problems, both come from trouble, both have things about them that they want the world to see past and (in Remus' case in particular) certainly have issues.
How this does relate to RP
I like them because I'm drawn to that imperfect dynamic. I mean, any couple that I'm know for playing out is usually not straight-forward because no relationships really are. I do think, however, that circumstances played a huge role in them getting together -- not just the Build up/Second War -- but their own individual circumstances and so it is something that I think relies very heavily on the interpretation on the both characters and their compatibility.